We are on the mend!

Hi everyone! Well Tobias is looking much better and I am almost back in good health. Just a bit stuffy in the head with an occasional cough. Today I went and bought one of those new gadgets that scans your photo negatives onto your computer so this afternoon I have got some old photos and put them on a hard drive as back up which for me was fun. It might seem boring to some people but we don't have actual photo copies of some of the negatives so some photos are ones we have not seen in around 10 or more years. I tried to post two photos (one of me as a toddler and one of Tobias for comparison) but for some reason the blogger photo upload is not working :( I will try again tomorrow perhaps. Anyways it is Midnight and I am extremely tired so unfortunately that is all I will be posting tonight. Goodnight my loyal fans! Sweet dreams xoxo

Tobias is still sick and so am I.

Hi everyone. I still can't see a light at the end of the tunnel as I am now sick too. I started to feel it on Sunday and yesterday my throat flared up and I just feel like crap. And Tobias is still really sick. He has spent the last week in bed most of the time. That is where he is now. I hate this cold. I really despise winter. I was supposed to see my councellor today (and I really need to) but that is not going to happen. :( I hate having no energy and I hate seeing Tobias like this.

I am not really sure what else to say. Because we are house bound I don't really have anything interesting to say. Anyways if something happens I'll let you know. Other than that I guess I'll come back when we are feeling better. Bye for now xoxo

Tobias is sick!! :(

Hi everyone. I have had a rough couple of days as Tobias is really sick. It started out as what seemed like a cold but now it is a full blown runny nose, croaky voice, flemmy cough, won't eat much, very sick, sickness. :( He has been so sooky it is definately not fun. Last night I gave him a dinner of just vegies in hope that the big rush of nutrients would help him feel better but he doesn't seem much better today. He ate some Farex for breakfast so hopefully that helps him feel a bit better. I have given him Nurofen and cuddles and he is just really sad. I don't know what else to do really. He doesn't have the energy to play so I have just layed him down in his cot with his mobile and heater on so hopefully he has a nap or something. It sucks having a sick baby. I just want him to get better but he just seems to be getting worse. I would take him to the doctors but they can't give him antibiotics so there really is no point. We just have to wait it out. Meanwhile I am just giving him lots of warm milk, water, Nurofen, and honey on his dummy. Any other ideas to help him get better quicker??

On a lighter note, yesterday we had a playdate with Connor and Patricia. They are a mum and bub I met when I stayed at Torrens house when Tobias was 3 months old. It was great to see them again and watch Tobias and Connor playing together. Tobias kept trying to get the toy that Connor had. He is a bit of a bully. That is definately something we will have to work on! :P
Patricia also gave me a new quilt and quilt cover set which is awesome! :) My bed is soooo nice and warm now and looks great :D

Anyways I am really hungry so I am going to find some food! :) Hope you all have a great day!

Hi guys! New Video!

Hi Everyone, I think this just about sums it up. I am in for some trouble now!! :S

Sorry I've been pretty slack lately...

Hi all, how are you? Sorry I haven't posted in a while. I have just been going through some photos and footage. I can't believe how fast the last 6 years have gone. Its just flown! And the sad thing is I really believe I wasted it. I slacked off in school, didn't complete my sace, and am still working at McDonalds. Other people I know are coming up to the stage of completely Tafe and half way through University, and some are really going up in the world. I just think to myself, you had the same opportunities as them and look where you are. Stuck at home 24/7 with a baby, every day seeming exactly like the last. Things are progressing, yes, but at a pace so slow it makes me want to just give up out of frustration. I have found a program that will help me complete my sace and hopefully help me get into Tafe. Its with Louise Place in Adelaide. It is a learn-at-your-own-pace program for young mums with carers who watch your baby for you while you are in class.

Anyways at the moment Tobias is being really difficult and not going to sleep and he is really starting to get on my nerves. I have fed him, changed him, sung to him played with him etc etc etc tucked him in nice and tight and warm and he is just being a real sook. Lets hope he calms down now and goes to sleep. My sister is out shopping with my mum and they have been out alll day since about 10:30 this morning. I'm feeling a bit lonely at the moment too.

On a different note, have you ever seen the movie "The Craft"? It is definately one of my all time favourite movies. It is actually like 10 (or more) years old and I only just saw it last week. I love it because I am really into wiccan and witches. I've only recently actually started researching it and such and I find it extremely fascinating. I would have loved to have been brought up around wicca so that I knew more about it. Being in touch with nature and connecting with it is a very interesting theory.
But my mum just thinks its all evil. She doesn't even like the fact that I have an anne stokes poster in my room. And she thinks the dark fairie statues I like are disgusting. It can be amusing and frustrating at the same time. :P

Oh and another confession I have is that earlier on today I was an absolute pig and ate about 3 quarters of a litre of ice cream. I know... naughty!! :S But it tastes soooooooooooo gooooood!!! It is the cadbury caramel ice cream. Caramel and chocolate ice cream with caramel sauce mixed through!) mmmm.. I eat when I am bored, lonely, or depressed. (So pretty much most of the time) :P

Hi sorry its been so long!

Hi everyone, how are you all? I'm ok. Just came on here to give you an update on my situation.
I saw my lawyer the other day to sign my response to Christophers affidavit so that it could be filed. And yesterday Christopher came to see Tobias for is weekly visit and I swear he couldn't get more annoying if he tried!! He sits there the whole time saying "my lawyer said this, my lawyer said that, bla blah blah!!" Its so frustrating! for example, "My lawyer isn't happy that I'm only seeing Tobias once a week, My lawyer is not happy that I am paying you $100 a fortnight, she wants me to go through child support, but I told her it was my choice, I said it's what I want to do, but she's still mad at me blah blah blah!" I feel like saying, "I don't care what your lawyer says! Just let the courts deal with it if you can't stand up to your own lawyer. Geez!"
Ugh, he is so stupid. Here is an example of that absolute nil awareness and common sense. Last week when we paid for the professional photos, This is what happened. We met at Centro Colonnades and went to the booth together. The photographers laid out all of the photos of Tobias so we could choose which ones we wanted. We chose, we paid, I took the photos (I will be making copies of them for Christopher next week) and we left.
Then, yesterday at mums house while he was visiting, he says, "So, have they taken the photos yet?"
ME: What photos?
CHRISTOPHER: The photos of Tobias?
ME: Has who taken what photos of Tobias?
CHRISTOPHER: Have those people that we paid last week taken photos of Tobias yet?
ME: What do you mean?
CHRISTOPHER: You know how we paid for some professional photos of Tobias last week?
ME: Yeah?
CHRISTOPHER: Well have they taken the photos yet?
ME: Are you kidding me? Are you seriously asking if they have done the photo session yet, when last week we looked at, and chose, our favourite photos of Tobias, paid for, and then collected them?
CHRISTOPHER: .... Um... Yeah?
ME: *Under my breath* Oh. My. God.
CHRISTOPHER: What?
ME: You are so much dumber than I thought. Whose kid did you think you were looking at? Are you seriously telling me you didn't know that was Tobias?
CHRISTOPHER: I don't know...

Oh My GOD! He is so Stupid!!!! And if that isn't bad enough...

When it was time to leave Christopher carried Tobias out to the car, Christine has her bag and some toys and I had my bag and some toys and the blanket. Christine opens the boot and she and I put the toys and blanket into the boot. I step back and Christopher steps forward and leans in to put TOBIAS IN THE BOOT! WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! I quickly put my arm in the way and grab Tobias and say "What are you doing!??!?!?!?!"
CHRISTOPHER: Putting Toby in.. Um.. *goes quiet*

Seriously. He has ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyways thats my rant for now. Tobias is getting cranky so I'd better go.

I'm getting a massage today!

Hi everyone! i don't mean to brag, but I am sitting in the waiting room at my physiothearaists waiting to get a massage! It's a whole hour of complete relaxation! :D I am sooooo excited I can't wait!! I just hope that she doesn't want to talk much during this session. I usually come here once a week for actual physiothearapy on my back, neck and shoulders and we usually have a chat during those sessions. But I'd really just like to chill out this time. :)
Also I might be picking up my new glasses today. They are white with zebra stripes on the side. They are my most adventurous glasses I have ever ordered! :) I usually just get plain black or single coloured ones. And this is also payday (or as I like to call it, "D-day"). :S Its the day I get paid and also have to pay the rent, do a HUGE grocery shop AND put aside the bill money. It is also very scary to see how much is left over after doing all that! :S ok, I will check back with you all later xoxo

Hello :)

Hi everyone, sorry its been a while since my last post. How are you all? I saw my lawyer today to discuss my response to Christopher's affidavit in regards to Tobias. I am now sitting at home watching Primevil, a new show which looks like something inspired by Jurassic Park. I love Jurassic Park :) I don't know why. I think maybe it's because it is predictable? Tobias is in bed, he went to bed at 7pm and I am hoping he sleeps through tonight as he has not had much sleep today. Tomorrow I am very excited because I have booked myself in for a massage at my physiothearapist. I can't wait! Anyways, I don't really have anything new to say at the moment. Stay tuned though :) xoxo

Kadina today to relax... :)

Good morning everyone!
so, today is going to be a nice relaxing day once we actually get on the road but at the moment I am in the nursary waiting for the bath to fill up so we can get ready. Tobias has had brekky, I just gave him some fruit custard this morning as a treat because he's been having weetbix like every day. He is being very noisy this morning and I seriously cannot wait to get going.
We have relatives that live in Kadina so that is the main reason we are going there. My mums dad, mum and some sisters live there. Kadina, incase you don't know is a small country town about 2 hours drive northish out of Adelaide. My sister and I have started a tradition that whenever we go to Kadina and have dinner at the pub we play $10 on the pokies. :) Its heaps of fun because my way of doing it is too keep everything I win back (that includes adding up every 10 cents I win back too, so I usually only loose like 3 bucks if I don't win anything :)
And yesterday I decorated another cake. :) ok, so thats all for now but I might come back later while we are on the road if I'm bored. Xoxo

So it turned out ok..

Ok so, Christine ended up cleaning the bathroom this morning before leaving for work which was awesome. She also dried the dishes and put them away. :) I really appreciate it when she helps out with the house work. Like when she hangs out my washing. I just get frustrated somethimes when her birds make a mess.

As for the visit with Tobias's dad, it was awkward for me but thanks to mum being there it was a little bit better than last time. He just sat on the floor playing with him most of the time.

Anyway Tobias just woke up and I have to get the birds some dinner and such so I'd better get moving. xoxo

Its a freezing start to the day.

So, today is Thursday and I usually go to "Mums 'R' Us" on Thursday mornings but unfortunately Tobias still has a runny nose and I don't want him passing on his germs to other kids. But I also have my councelling appointment at 1pm today and I really don't think missing that is an option. So mum is going to walk to her work where Christine has the car (she is working an early shift today) and mum is going to pick me up and look after Tobias while I'm at my appointment. Yay :) That will be sooooo good. He is usually with me and can be quite distracting while we are trying to talk.

Right now he is with me in the lounge room crawling around having a play before his morning nap.
I was just thinking about my "perfect day" and this is what I came up with:

1) A whole day without Tobias
2) A massage at a day spa
3) A new disney movie to watch while somebody brushes my hair
4) Chinese Take away for dinner while watching the sunset at the beach (in the car)
5) Chocolate and caramel ice cream with gooey caramel topping for dessert in a cozy warm lounge room watching funniest home videos :)

What is your idea of a perfect day? xoxo

My poor toe!

Hi everyone. Well I pretty much wasted my afternoon today. At about 1:45pm Tobias was on his way into the bathroom and I ran over and shut the door... over my little pinky toe on my right foot. Well, that frikkin hurt!! I couldn't walk on it or even wriggle it a little because it hurt so much. I was stressing out because that is the last thing I needed. I called mum because Christine had taken the car out. Christine picked up mum and came home to babysit Tobias while I went to the doctors fearing the worst. We ended up having to wait like 3 hours to see a doctor and by then the pain had subsided and it is now just a dull throb and I can walk but not properly, I just sort of limp along with my toes up. I am hoping it just gets better but the doctor booked me for an xray tomorrow just incase because it might be fractured or something.

While we were gone Tobias was very loud and did not have an afternoon nap so you can imagine how pleased Christine was. But now Tobias is finally in bed and we can enjoy the peace and quiet. Anyways, I'm about to check out the TAFE SA website to see if applications are still open. I might be lucky. Fingers crossed!! xoxo

Prepare to be shocked!!!!

Hi everyone. You are not going to believe what happened at Tobias's Paediatric appointment yesterday.
When Tobias was born he came out with a lump on his head. They were a bit worried about it so just to make sure everything was ok they gave it an ultrasound. The lump was not attatched to or extended through Tobias's skull so all of the doctors and specialists labelled it simply a "strawberry" which occurs when during labour the baby is sitting on and putting a lot of pressure on the cervix. sort of like if you stuck the end of a vaccuum cleaner on your head and left it sucking there for too long. Strawberries are very common and they usually "deflate" inbetween 6 months and 2 years. Well Tobias's lump had already deflated, infact, it had become an indent on his head. And the skin in that indent was different to the rest of his skin. It is hard, stiff and a different cloudy white colour.
When the paediatrition looked at Tobias's head yesterday he was quite shocked and told me that the bump clearly was not a "strawberry" as everyone had thought. It was infact a growth, a very very rare deformity and now as a result, Tobias would be stuck with this indent all his life. But, it would be dangerous to leave it as it is because that skin in his indent is missing alot of vital pigments (it is missing all muscle, fat and pigments that regular skin has). And as such, that patch of skin is like a ticking time bomb for sun/skin cancer. So Tobias will have to have plastic surgery to get the indent of skin removed. He must get it done now as a baby because it will just get extremely complicated the older he gets. So, after the operation he will be left with a level head but a lifelong scar. It was such a shock!! :(
My paediatrition is going to write me a referral to a plastic surgen so we can start the ball rolling on getting this fixed as soon as possible. I'll check back with you later but right now Tobias is getting into the recycling basket in the kitchen! xoxo

Back for another post cause I have nothing else to do

Hello again!

Well I am in a great mood! Thanks to one particular reader :D Thank you for your lovely comment Hannah :D It is so reassuring to know that someone actually appreciates my blog.

Tobias is in bed again so I thought I'd do something different for a change and post about one of my favourite hobbies: Cake Decorating. I love cake decorating! I'm not great at it but its something I'd love to study and get lots of practice in on. I have done a few cakes in the past. One for my brother's birthday and one for my sister's birthday but most of the others were just for the fun of it. I would love to do it more often but I hardly ever get the chance (special occasions are quite rare). I find I am more creative when I am given a theme to work with.

As you can see my best work was my brother's birthday cake. I used a photo of his motorbike and just tried to make it look as close to that as possible. I baked a chocolate square cake then drew a rough outline of his bike on a piece of paper, cut that out, and used it as a stencil to cut around. Once I had the shape of the bike I just used writing icing and those little edible silver balls to "colour it in". Then I put chocolate icing around the outside (just because it tasted amazing and I knew he'd love it!) :)

My sisters cake was just a rush job so it didn't turn out as nice as I would have liked but it still looked pretty good.
The blue one with the flower was done for my mum for mothers day. The flower is actually just a few marshmallows cut in half and stuck down with yellow icing in the middle.
The winnie the pooh cake was my first attempt at a character cake. I was really disapponted with the outcome because I had set my expectations way too high. But at least now I know what it is like working with icing trying to draw something.

The "Mums 'R' Us" cake was one that I made for my young mums group. It is decorated completely with marzipan except for the faces and writing. (thats writing icing). That was my first ever marzipan cake. I fell in love with marzipan after that!!

Anyways thanks for reading! :D

Another long day ahead 6/6/2011

Hi everyone. How are you all? Well today we are off to an okish start. Tobias woke up at 6am and went back for a nap at about 9:15 then woke up at about 10. Now we are sitting in the lounge room after a busy morning of cleaning and such. My sister left the house at 7:30am and won't return home until 9pm, so it is a very long lonely day at home. I really need to get some groceries but shouldn't really take Tobias out in the cold while he is sick.
I wonder who is actually reading this?
Anyways, I am really bored. I'm thinking of watching a movie but I've watched every dvd in this house and am craving something new.
On a lighter note, I had a good night with Tobias as he slept through from about 8pm til 6am which was awesome :) Ok, well, thats all I've really got to say today.
Hope you all have an awesome day. xoxo

Sorry about yesterdays outburst...

Hi all,

Please accept my apologies for yesterdays rant.
Tobias is still sick and it has been diagnosed as a simple cold and we just have to wait it out. My sister is working 12pm-8:30pm again today so its another long lonely day stuck at home. I did invite some friends over but they never replied to my messages. I can't say I'm surprised.

It is freeeeeezing too which sucks.
But on a lighter note, today is the first day that I am wearing contacts. It's just a trial run for a few days, just to see if I would prefer them or glasses. Well I'll tell you one thing, it is sooooooo weird being able to see clearly, then looking in the mirror and not seeing a pair of glasses. And not having to keep pushing them back up. Its awesome :)

Anyway, my plans for today are to clean up and then sit around waiting to hear back from my friends. And of course look after Tobias. He was up every hour and a half last night. Just crying and snuffling. I feel for him, I really do, but at the same time I was just soooo dead tired that all I wanted to do was cry too. Especially after the crap day I had emotionally. I don't deal with stress very well. I am an emotional eater which is a terrible habit. I've put on so much weight because when I am stressed and depressed I just eat and eat and eat!! Yesterday I ate Jelly, Ice cream, weetbix, leftovers and just anything else I could find. It's not good.

Anyway I hope you are all doing ok. xx

Bored and lonely

Hi, me again.
I am at home alone with Tobias. He has been in a weird mood today. He slept for 13 hours straight last night, was up for 2 and half hours then went back to sleep, woke up for not even two hours and has gone back to bed. He was really cranky while he was up. I even gave him panadole and put teething gel on his gums just incase that was his problem, but he was still really upset. We went for a quick walk out to post some letters but that didn't help much. Poor little man :( I don't know whats wrong with him.
On a different note, I am curious to know who is reading this. If anyone. Leave a comment if you like. :)
Thanks for reading :) xoxo

The End of the World!! LOL

Hi all, its Saturday 21st of May 2011. Apparently the apocolyps is happening today? lol, I highly doubt it. The guy who is claiming this has predicted the end of the world in the past and as you can see, he was very wrong. :P I cant believe all of his followers have quit their jobs and given away all of their possessions and money. What are they going to do on Sunday when they wake up and they are not only still here, but have nothing? Its a bit nuts. Anyways, Tobias is in bed at the moment and I cleaned up last night so I am just chilling out. I am kinda bored and lonely though. I wish I could go to the shops and get some chocolate or something :P
Anyone want to bring me some? Hehe :) Ok well I dont really have much else to say so bye for now, not forever! lol xoxo

This is a poem I wrote...

Untitled

So much you don't know,

Your so close yet so far,

The words on my lips just can't escape,

Just for you I'll raise the bar,



In everything I do I'll do for the one,

You are always in my heart,

The things I know are secret still,

But there we'll never be apart,



You love another, I see its beauty,

Tarnish that I will never,

Your happiness is all I desire,

Though the sacrifice cuts deep forever,



My soul sings for you day and night,

My eyes search for you,

My ears listen for you, hear your light,

Your words are music your smile sings true.

A Big day of firsts!!

Hi everyone :) Tobias crawled forward for the first time EVER today!! :D So Exciting! He also fed himself for the first time. :D He ate steamed carrot sticks and broccoli. He made the biggest mess though. (The first of MANY to come I'm sure.) It was so adorable to watch him try to pick it up and put it in his mouth. It was so soft and his grip is so strong he basically mushed it up in his hand before he could get it in his mouth! Then he smeared it all over his high chair. He was concerntraing so hard the look on his face was so cute. :D And it did not take him long at all to get the right idea. :) I have such a smart boy.
Well as for Tobias's father taking me to court....
We had court mediation the other day and it was agreed that he would start to give me $100 a fortnight and he would see Tobias twice a week, supervised, at my mum's house. Two times a week is waaaaaay more than I am comfortable with but at least he is going to start helping out financially. Anyway, hope you are all well! xoxo

The moment a child is born, the mother is also born.
She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new





HAPPY 1ST MUMMY DAY

Tiffany



You are a great, wonderful, and traffic mum to Tobias.



Keep going girl.



I was going to put this on your blogg but I don’t have access so feel free to cut and past the above if you like.



Love Katheirne

Hey everyone. Toby has his first tooth!

well, actually, he has 2!! my little man is growing up so fast!! I'm going to miss his gummy smile... :(

Tobias having some playtime and practicing his "Mumumumum"

Wednesday 16th of March 2011

So.. Centrelink sent me a letter today.. My baby bonus has run out. I was really hoping to be working more by now, making up the money that I wouldn't be getting.. :S So now its time to make up a budget. How is everyone coping financially?
I am really bored alot. I'd love to go get a hair cut, physio, a massage etc but I am always stuck with Tobias. :/

We're back!

Hi everyone. Sorry it has been so long inbetween posts. I haven't really had much to say. Tobias is 10kgs and 71cms long/tall. I am still looking into daycare for him so I can get back into study. Its moments like the one I had yesterday that make me wish there was some kind of instant fix. Last night we were all at mums for dinner. My older brother and sister and my younger brother were all busy with their heads in their homework, all busy studying away while I was sitting there with Tobias watching TV. It really makes me feel belittled especially when they talk about how proud they are of each other. I wish I could be studying right now. I feel as though I wont ever look like I am trying my hardest at life until I am studying and have a good job as well as doing an outstanding job as a mum. Until then I feel like everyone is looking down their noses at me. I am also struggling with my ability to cope with every day life. Its hard but I just try to take it one hour at a time. I'm afraid it reflects in my attitude towards everyone lately. I have been very snappy and down alot. I dont mean to offend or annoy everyone but that is what ends up happening when I can't control my attitude. I just feel tired all the time. Lethargic like i have no energy or even the will to do anything at all.

Its friday!

Hi everyone, so I havent posted since wednesday, sorry about that. It was my brother's birthday yesterday and we had a little party for him on wednesday for which I made the banner and cake. Plus Tobias has been in a really bad mood lately, I'm not sure what is wrong with him. We did have a really good routine established but for the last week he has just been all over the place and being really LOUD! :S
This morning when he woke up I realised he had undone his nappy so he had peed all over himself and his bedding so that was pretty gross. So I quickly chucked his bedding and clothes in the wash and we had a bath straight away. For the record, I usually use huggies nappies but this week I got my nappies from the chemist near our house and they only had snugglers. They are really not as good in my opinion.
Right now he is in his bouncer while I'm on here and dispite being fed, nappy changed, and having a variety of toys at his disposal he chooses to squeal and carry on in this really annoying high pitched whine. Ugh its so annoying. I'm pretty sure he's just doing it for attention because there is nothing else it could be. Anyways I'd better go and sort him out. xoxo

Monday part 2 :)

Hello again fellow bloggers :) Its 12:03pm and Tobias is laying next to me on the couch testing his voice box. He loooves the sound of his own voice. Which usually gives me a headache. I've propped him up against me now and he is intently watching me type. We went for a 50 minute walk this morning and as soon as we got back I jumped on the cross trainer (for the first time in months) for ten whole minutes which for me is pretty darn amazing. Then I just about calapsed off the cross trainer, put Tobias in the lounge room, had a shower, glanced in the mirror and just about died! My face was red raw and thats when it clicked, I'd forgotton to put sunscreen on.... :S Whoops!! I just covered it up with foundation so I dont look like a beetroot if anyone visits.

As for Tobias's sleeping, it has gone back to being very broken during the night. For example, last night he went to bed at 9:45ish, then woke at 11pm, 1am, 3am, 4:30am and then 7:30. It kinda sucked not being able to get a decent chunk of sleep because thats basically what he has been doing for about 2 weeks now I think.. (something like that anyway). Its more disappointing because he had started sleeping through the night from 10pm until about 7 or 8am. It was great! Oh well, we cant have everything i guess. :P Anyhoo... Tobias is due for a feed now so I'd best get on top of that..
Catch ya later xoxo

New Beginnings

Good morning all. Its Monday the 7/2/2011 9:08am (according to my computers clock).
How was everyone's weekends? Mine was pretty boring, although I do have some news.
I am starting a lifestyle change as of yesterday. Yesterday morning Tobias and I went out for a walk to the chemist (its about 25 minutes each way) to pick up some nappies and formula. Well, after picking up those two items I wandered over to the weight loss section and ended up stocking up on 2 weeks worth of dietry shakes! I am currently a size 16 and the last time I weighed myself I was about 90kgs so I have finally worked up enough will and courage to start to lose weight. So yesterday was day one and this is how it (and all others from now on) will go...

Wake up, clean up dishes and such from last night, have a dietry shake for breakfast, go for a walk, have a shower, do any washing that needs doing, have lunch, do any housework that needs doing, maybe go for another walk, then have a healthy (but hearty) meal for dinner.

It is going to be so hard because I absolutely love my food, but I would really like to trim down in time for my best friends wedding in april. Well, I'm hoping to be at least half way to my goal by then. I would like to lose a total of 20kgs, maybe 25kgs, so that I am the right weight for my health.

Anyways Tobias just woke up, so I'd better go get him before he cracks a major. I'll be back later on though to update you on his situation with his sleeping and such. It hasn't been the best lately.. :S Anyways catch ya later xoxo

Saturday... wow its the weekend already!

Hi all, sorry I skipped two days. I've been a bit slack (and busy) lol. Well, lets catch you up.
Thursday began like any other boring day. Feeding Tobias, playing with Tobias, cleaning up etc etc etc. Then my sister walked into the lounge room at about midday and said that she had agreed to do something with a friend that she actually didn't want to do. Belly Dancing! Then she suggested instead of completely cancelling, that I should take her place and she would babysit for me. Well, yes! of course I'll do it!! So now every Thursday night at 7pm I join my friend Katherine for an hour of hip-swinging belly dancing! Its just a beginners introduction course but wow! it is so much harder than it looks! And its actually quite a good work out! :)
I wear a blue shirt, grey tights, long blue skirt and a blue hip scarf. Its a proper belly dancing hip scarf with those little coins that chink-shink-chink when you swish your hips around.
And yesterday (friday) was my sister's 24th birthday. Tobias and I got up early and headed to the shops before it got too hot and picked up a few supplies to make and decorate the cake. (Ok, so I didnt actually make the actual sponge cake, I just bought the woolworths double unfilled sponge cake bases.) Then I put Strawberry jam and whipped cream in the middle and decorated the top with pink icing and little icing flowers, those little edible silver balls, and writing icing that said "Happy 24th Birthday Christine". It turned out pretty good. Even if it did look a bit girly-girlish. :) We ended up staying home and ordering chinese for dinner from our favourite Chinese take away call "The Lucky Garden". I swear their chicken is always cooked PERFECTLY!
And Tobias enjoyed seeing his uncles and Nandy. (Nandy is a mix of "Nanna" and mum's name "Sandy"). He is asleep at the moment. I doubt he will be for much longer. Last night he went to bed at about 8pm, then woke up at 4am, went back to sleep at about 5am then woke up at 7am and went back to bed at about 10am. and its now 11:15am. I really enjoy the time when he is asleep because when he is awake he really loves the sound of his own voice. He just talks and talks (in his little baby language of course) and squeals and carries on. It gets annoying very fast.

Anyway, as it is Saturday, that getts me thinking about what other people my age would be doing today/tonight. Hanging out with friends, shopping, going out dancing tonight etc etc etc... I would love to have that freedom of just going out whenever and wherever I want :( But you know what I am actually doing today and tonight? Sitting at home, cleaning, looking after Tobias, bored out of my brain!! :( Thats one thing that really gets me down alot. I try to invite friends over but they are already busy or got a better offer. And if they do come over its usually later at night and all we can do is watch movies or play a board game. The same things over and over and over again!! I really miss variety... :(

How do you feel about those sorts of things? Is it just me being selfish or do other young mums feel the same??

Skipped a day but I'm back

Hi all, sorry I didnt post yesterday. I ran out of internet credit. (We have prepaid mobile broadband). Yesterday Tobias and I went out to the shops to get out of the house because I felt like I was going insane! It was good to do some retail therapy but I ended up spending a bit more than I should have, buying the original Monopoly game and a DVD of the Beatrix Potter collection. (Peter Rabbit and such). Oh, and a bunch of chocolate that I really should have left at the shops.. lol :P
Then I came home and it was back to boring.
So today I went out again (I was supposed to meet up with Tobias's dad but that didn't end up happenning) so I just shopped around again. didn't buy anything though except KFC for lunch. I have been craving it the last few days. It was sooo gooooood :) I really should not eat as much junk food as I do. I always pay for it when I look in the mirror :/
I was also supposed to have lunch with a guy I met on Oasis Active today but he bailed just as I arrived at Marion saying he had to leave for a doctors appointment... Well... I have my doubts. I was quite pissed off (excuse the language) because it was all-systems-go until he realised Tobias was coming. (I did say to him last night he would be coming but he obviously wasnt paying attention) so when he suddenly couldnt hang around I immediately deleted him from my list of possible friends. That was so rude and anyone who isnt cool with Tobias, isnt cool with me. Stupid men. Ugh. Dont get me wrong, the good ones are out there (or so I've been told) but where on earth are they??? Lol! Oh well, Mr Right is out there somewhere. Perhaps we will meet at the Ballroom Dancing classes I am going to enrol in soon. They start in March and I am SUPER excited! I've always wanted to learn how to dance properly and this is my chance to do something awesome for myself.
Anyhoo, hope your all well, whoever you are :) See ya tomorrow :)

Back again :)

Hi all, yes I'm back for another round while Tobias is asleep. This is actually quite fun because it gives me something to do and something for you to read. :) Lol even if it is just a whole bunch of babble.
Can I ask you a question? What do you guys think of online dating? I do it to knida kill time when Tobias is asleep, hoping to meet someone genuine. The chances of that are so incredibly slim, almost every guy I talk to instantly begins flirting and hinting about jumping into bed. Its So FRUSTRATING! I just tell them all to bugger off because thats not what I am looking for. Its such a pain. Then when you do end up meeting someone who isnt like that they are not interested in going out with someone who has a son. (Which is understandable I suppose). I get really annoyed sometimes when I think about that. I cant just go out when I want anymore, cant stay out late or go out to dinner with a man unless I bring the pram and that just makes it awkward. :/
I'm sure alot of you would probably tell me how selfish I am being and how I shouuld just be focusing on Tobias but I have needs too.
If I just focused on Tobias all the time and push my needs away into a dusty old corner and never paid them any attention I know I would get depressed. How do I know this? Well because I tried it and that is what happened. It's just the way I am. I get lonely very easily and I crave cuddles late at night. At least by going on Oasis every now and again I can keep my loneliness at bay. And it kinda helps me think, "See? Haha you don't really need a guy, they are all too sleazy." So i back off a bit and I feel better for it. :)
I dont know if this is making sense to you. I hope so. Maybe you feel like that too sometimes? Let me know :) Bye for now :) xoxo

Day 2

Well, Tobias had a health check today and it turns out he is actually 4 and a half months old, not five.. :P I was getting a bit ahead of myself. He weighs 8.8kgs and is 68cm long/tall. His social developement is right on par where it should be and his size and weight are excellent too. He is a very healthy baby, minus a tiny bit of congestion in his nose. He should be rolling over soon, he can roll onto his side, he just hasn't figured out that he has to move his arm out of the way to roll completely over.
Last night we had an excellent night! He went to bed at about 8:45pm and didnt wake up until about 8am this morning so I had a great sleep!! :) He is now on his back on the floor just having a bit of a play before his next feed. He is due to go back to bed at about 1pm or 1:30pm. He is getting a bit testy though so I may have to go get his bottle ready now. I can't breast feed otherwise I wouldn't be giving him a bottle. It's a long story but it really sucks.. Anyways I'll probably be back in about an hour or whenever he goes to bed.
Is anybody out there actually reading this? Or am I just sending stuff out into a black void? Please comment if you do read this! It'd be great to know there is someone who can relate! :) Talk soon! xoxo

My baby boy is 5 months old already!

Hi out there! My name is Tiffany and I am 19 years old and I have a 5 month old son named Tobias. I am a single parent living with my 23 year old sister. In this blog I am going to just write about everything I am going through, things that annoy me and things that I love.

Right now it is Sunday 30th of January 12:30pm. Tobias is asleep and has been for the last 2 and a half hours. I am sitting on the couch in the lounge room bored out of my brain. I was meant to work today (I work casually at McDonalds in the McCafe.) but I had to call up sick because I have a cold. That really sucks because I only do one shift a week anyway and its my one chance to have some time to myself where I dont have to worry about Tobias for a few hours.

My days usually run something like this:

6am - Tobias wakes for a feed
6:30am - Tobias goes back to sleep so I have a shower, get ready for the day and do last nights dishes. Then I'll tidy up a bit and watch some TV and check facebook until Tobias wakes up again.
9am - Tobias wakes up for the day. I feed him, bath him and play with him until he is ready for his nap at about 11am.
11am - Tobias goes to bed and I watch TV / check facebook until he wakes up again. then its feed, play, sleep. watch tv. he wakes up, feed, play, sleep. watch TV... etc etc etc etc etc...

It continues on until about 10pm when he goes down for the night. My life is so incredibly boring. I dont have my drivers license or a car so if i want to go out it usually takes up the whole day, trying to make sure Tobias gets his sleep when he needs it while we are out. I feel like all I do is clean the house, wash the dishes, do the grocery shopping and look after Toby. The same thing day after day drives me insane!! I'd love to go out more shopping and such but its so difficult with him because he hates being in the pram.

Sorry, it seems like all I am doing is complaining. I'm just trying to give you a mental picture of how bored I am all the time. I thought if I start a blog it might give me something to do while he is asleep. And hopefully connect me with people that are sort of feeling the same or get what I am going through. My other 1 post blog sort of describes how I got into this situation.

Anyways, I hope you stayed tuned, I promise things will get more interesting than this :)

See you tomorrow! xoxo (or perhaps later on this arvo) :P